ThayerAvenue.com

While votes and suggestions were taken into (serious) consideration for the answers here, I took the final say upon myself because… well, because I can. Note that the less-surprising “Best of” Contest sponsored by the Silver Spring Center closes voting on Thursday, July 31. Cast your vote for McDonald’s on Colesville today!

1. Where is the best place to hit a pedestrian while driving?
Colesville, between Georgia and Fenton There might be some argument about this, mainly from those who believe the Ellsworth/Fenton intersection should have won. The reason Colesville won out was because of the 5-6 lanes of traffic, higher speeds, and lone individuals who blatantly flaunt the red silhouette on the opposite side of the street. Fensworth has its moments, but the sheer density of people there, groups that jaywalk, and fewer lanes of traffic put it into 2nd place.

On a different note, I’ve almost hit the same person three times on Georgia Avenue near Montgomery College. Some idiot constantly tries to cross six lanes of traffic, seemingly to get to the 7-11. Last time I almost hit him, it was night, he was wearing dark clothing, and he actually turned back after getting halfway across the street. Anyone else almost hit this guy? I figure he’s next in line for an obituary write-up.

2. What’s the best restaurant in which to start a food fight?
Blue Pearl The vast amount of mediocre food almost demands it. And I haven’t seen the person in the panda costume out there in a while. Are they still doing that? Last time I saw him, he got tackled into the street by a bunch of rowdy teenagers, most likely on a wager.

3. Where is the best place to drink yourself under the table?
Quarry House Post closing. But that’s just hypothetical, because it would be illegal for any establishment to serve alcohol after closing time. There were some votes for D.C., but I had to nix those as this is, after all, the Best of Silver Spring.

A close second goes to Springvale Roader’s kitchen, just for the sheer brilliance of the answer.

4. What is the best historic structure to demolish?
The 9-Acre North Parcel of Falkland Chase

Any questions? The thought of the B&O Railroad Station was intriguing, though

5. Who’s the best employer for a catty, high school-like environment?
Discovery Communications Even though the entire staff of the Silver Spring Penguin voted for the Penguin itself (including others, weirdly enough), I’ve heard too many stories about our venerable (currently sharkless) behemoth.

I might have also accepted my former employer here in Silver Spring (who shall remain nameless). Where were you guys?

6. Where do you have the best chance of getting shot?
Piney Branch and University I think we’ve beaten this dead horse enough.

7. Where do you have the best chance of getting mugged?
Under the SS Metro bridge on Colesville I know there are plenty of other places people get mugged, but from what I’ve heard, this seems to be awfully popular. The Forest Glen footbridge would certainly be up there on the list, but it’s not in DTSS, and that’s our focus here.

8. What’s the best restaurant for the next rat infestation?
McDonald’s Though some of the small ethnic restaurants on Georgia between Wayne and Silver Spring Ave could give it a run for its money. Almost as if we had our own El Ratarindo Tamarindo in the ‘hood.

9. Who will be next to set fire to their own establishment for insurance purposes?
Piratz Tavern The amount of grog consumed at the place is fuel enough – providing both lack of judgment and the equivalent of lighter fluid.

10. What’s the best program for Cable County Montgomery to add to its lineup?
Thayer Avenue Television (TATV) I’m going to beat this point home with the CCM hacks as long as it takes. Segments discussed in a previous post include CCM Smackdown, NIMBY Knowhow, and Mondays with Murray.

11. What are the odds on a $13.5 million home selling in the CBD?
13,500,000:1 Of course, this would come from our resident blogger-real estate expert.

12. What’s the best Silver Spring blog?
Silver Spring, Singular It’s the second oldest in our blogosphere (the first-on-the-block award going to the venerable Silver Spring Scene) and has a beautiful mix of serious news, sad commentary, and humorous mockery of the state of affairs in our fair city.

That having been said, mad props also go to The Silver Spring Penguin for their fantastic work. And being a parent, I think Jessica of A Parent in Silver Spring runs a great resource for those of us with rugrats.

13. Which Silver Spring street is the most sinister?
Ramsey Avenue The recent shooting and the proximity to the Metro station put it over the edge. Some say Bonifant, some say Thayer, but until Ripifant is actually a street, I’m going elsewhere with it. Just be happy I didn’t say Easley.