ThayerAvenue.com

Or at least *mattered*. No, I’m not getting all historic on you. (Come on - you know me better than that by now.) Thayer Avenue lost its one gas station. The place I always went to refill the gas cannister for the mower. And nothing else. I heard it was because of an outrageous rent hike, but I’d still like to get the full story. At least it gives me a chance to poke fun at the National Trust for Historic Preservation’s “This Place Matters” campaign.

And yes, I am (partially) in disguise.

In other news…

The building at 818 Easley Street (behind Alliance Comics) is reopening its doors the weekend of July 4th. Formerly Siembra First (a mortgage service company that opened at exactly the wrong time), it is now Forever Frugal, a consignment shop of sorts. Evidently, they’ll be happy to clean out your garage for you. Then they take the good stuff and sell it here.

I expect the inventory to change regularly, but this is a small sampling of things through the window. Yes, that is a hand chair. Some of the stuff is kitschy (good and bad), some isn’t. Oddly enough, those are Siembra First brochures on the table.

As I type this, there’s a man sitting outside the Perpetual Building at Georgia and Cameron giving people the finger and cursing at them. I never was really a fan of keeping the building after all the recent talk of tearing it down, but now it has a warm, special place in my heart. I managed to do a lap around the block by Mi Rancho and Tastee Diner just to snap a few less-than-conspicuous photos:

Crazy man inadvertently flipping me the bird

Crazy man giving the double bird to southbound drivers on Georgia Avenue

Crazy man telling me to fuck off and get a fucking haircut while flipping me the bird

His exact words to me were “Fuck you, you motherfucking asshole! Get a fucking haircut, motherfucker!” He managed to say something to that effect to every southbound driver at Georgia and Cameron. And I just got a haircut last week. God, I love this town.

First of all, thanks to all who made the crawfish boil an unqualified success. And because of the work involved (and subsequent necessary sleep), I have neglected to address a recent story in the Post.

Ahh, my beloved Washington Post. How I love to link to thee. I understand that the little “Where We Live” stories in the real estate section are done by freelancers and such, but even those people can get two sides of the story. Check out “At Stake, a Community’s Identity” which ran in the Sunday Real Estate section of the Post. For once, I’ll focus on a lack of journalistic equality and not dragging ESSCA itself through the mud. (Thanks to JUTP for the nod/nudge.)

Some questions to ask the story’s author, though: Where are the people who are pro-Purple Line? What about smart growth? I’m all for local businesses, but can’t there be a balance? To some extent, ESSCA seems to strike that balance, and they’ve done some good work in the neighborhood. Granted, I don’t agree with all their views, but I have to give credit where credit is due.

And speaking of ESSCA, how the hell did the East Silver Spring Citizens Association come to include 1,200 households? I’ll wager there aren’t that many members in the organization. Perhaps that many in East Silver Spring (proper), but they need to get the membership right. And I’ll also bet that there are plenty of people who don’t want to be represented by the likes of the ESSCA board.

Now to the boundaries of East Silver Spring. Does it go all the way to Georgia? I’ve heard many say that it stops at Fenton Street. That seems to make more sense. Is that definition of the border a land grab for the purposes of affecting more change in the Fenton Village development? Just wondering. There are also questions of whether the north border is Wayne or Bonifant, and if the south border stops at the DC line or the rail tracks. The South Silver Spring Association would have something to say about that, methinks.

And then this: “McCoy said a committee has formed to consider requesting designation as a historic district.” I think my response to this in an earlier post used the phrase “over my dead body”. I’m gonna stick with that for now, and you can bet this issue will be addressed in the future. In the meantime, I like the tweet from @sprungion that says “ESSCA seeks historic designation to preserve current officers.” Beautiful.

At any rate, it’s high time to get the other view out there. Yes, this is a great neighborhood. Sure, the issues have brought a lot of the people together. But we don’t all agree, and the growing swell of support I’ve seen for differing opinions dictates that those voices should be heard.

UPDATE: Speaking of a good, smart growth policy, the Washington Post  has a new story out today (”Sea Change Recommended in Montgomery County Growth Policy“) that highlights just the sort of policy I think we need. Sure, it’s gonna be painful in the short term, but these are the kind of changes that need to be made.

And would someone please run for the at-large council seat and send Marc Elrich back to Takoma Park?

There’s a revolution going on! Alert reader Mike sent in a link to Marc Fisher’s Wednesday column that I totally missed. And after likening ESSCA to the Soviet Nomenklatura on this blog, here’s the headline: (wait for it… wait for it…)

The Iron Fist Of Cleveland Park’s Politburo

Are you kidding me? This is AWESOME! The entire board is threatened with replacement, and they enact an emergency to postpone the elections? I really didn’t want to run for an ESSCA leadership position anymore, but I think now I do. This would be beautiful. And I could see ESSCA doing the exact same thing.

The last paragraph of Marc’s column simply says this:

This one’s far from over, but when the NIMBYs start waging their battles through Soviet means, it can’t be long before the forces of progress prevail.

Have a great weekend, folks!

Well, folks, the last ESSCA meeting was a snoozer. Except, of course for the great new people I met (you know who you are), and the fact that the entire board was re-elected in the span of 20 seconds. They called for any additional nominations (which never came), and then counted the ‘yeas’ and ‘nays’. They failed, of course, to call for abstentions, which I was going to be a part of. What the hell kind of organization are they running? Oh, yeah… I forgot. A crackerjack one. Can anyone score me a copy of the by-laws? As a member in good standing (READ: I paid my $10), I think I deserve to get a copy. As of late though, I seem to be out of the loop…

The “Grey” List
I can’t really call it a Black List, so we’ll settle for the warm, soft grey of a Counting Crows song to describe my listserv status. I seem to have angered the listserv gods, as I no longer receive any email from the ESSCA listserv. Perhaps they thought it would keep me from having material with which to poke fun at ESSCA.

Luckily, many of you alert readers continue to send me the emails (thank you), and we had some good, juicy exchanges last week. Observe one particular entertaining conversation and follow-up comments (names withheld to protect the psychotic):

Commenter #1: MCDOT was supposed to present plans to improve sidewalks and calm traffic on Sligo Avenue during last Monday’s ESSCA meeting. Because of a personal emergency, that did not happen… There will be no further public meetings concerning this project. MCDOT is ready to commence construction and wants to ensure that residents and users get a chance to ask questions and make comments. If you have questions or comments, please contact…

Commenter #2: While I am appreciative of your initiative on this project, you do not represent ESSCA (and are not even a member) and I would appreciate it if you would stop confusing the issue but making declarations about our presentations and guests and follow-up. THERE WILL BE ANOTHER PUBLIC PRESENTATION OF THE PROPOSED CHANGES TO SLIGO AVE, contrary to [NAME DELETED]’s previous post.

Commenter #1: Thanks for the correction, [NAME DELETED]. I am just reporting what I was told earlier today. Not trying to make decisions or confuse the issue. You’re the decider. I would never want anyone to think that I represent ESSCA.

Commenter #2: How about canning the passive aggressive snarkiness? Your pretense at innocence is wearing thin.

Commenter #1: It is this kind of treatment - from an ESSCA Board member, no less - that is to blame for my proud non-membership in ESSCA.

Let me repeat that: “Proud non-membership in ESSCA.” In the words of a fallen governor, that’s bleepin’ golden! You just can’t make shit like that up. The more I talk to people, the more I find out how many people *really* don’t like ESSCA. And there’s a lot of you out there.

It’s a shame that we’ll be off for the summer. ESSCA provides such material for ridicule. And while I will continue to be a member of ESSCA, I have been presented with some alternatives that may provide more steam for a better agenda. More on that soon.

In the meantime, I’ll flash my snazzy, professional-looking ESSCA membership card for meeting admission. I’ll antagonize them to allow renters full voting and membership rights. I will ridicule them when they do stupid shit and praise them when they do good stuff. And I anticipate much more of the former, given recent history. As long as they continue to act like a Vaudeville side show, they leave me no choice.

Keep those emails coming!

Don’t forget: the last ESSCA meeting of the season (until September) is tonight at the Sligo Recreation Center. Pizza and soda will be provided, and the festivities begin at 7:30. If you didn’t RSVP by May 15, though, leave the pizza be. I, for one, will not be partaking for fear of potential food tampering, sedation, kidnapping and torture due to my incessant mockery of the organization.

On the agenda for this evening:

• Re-election of the usual suspects to various ESSCA offices
• Mr. Dunkel, Pedestrian Safety Coordinator with the County’s Department of Transportation, will discuss proposed changes to Sligo Avenue
• Ms. Khashan, a partnership specialist with the U.S. Census Bureau, will discuss Census 2010 and the role that East Silver Spring residents will play in it.

And Speaking of ESSCA…
I’ve been pretty harsh on the ESSCA folks lately, so I want to make a couple of things clear. First, ESSCA does do some good things around the neighborhood. For example, they’re sponsoring a Community Paper Shred on May 23 at the Sligo Police Station. That’s nice. And there are some good, well-meaning people in the organization that fight for things in which they strongly believe. But they make some decisions and endorse some policies that I don’t agree with (which I have outlined in plenty of previous posts).

I will also continue to harp on the fact that the make up of the group (and particularly, its leadership) does not properly reflect the demographics of the neighborhood. It’s not just their fault - it’s the fault of all the people that live within the boundaries of East Silver Spring that don’t get involved, and I’m working to change that.

As long as people open themselves up to opinionated mockery, I will continue to make fun of them - whether it’s misspellings on public buildings, inappropriate use of quotation marks, or trying to take away the potential for a Harris Teeter at Falkland Chase. That’s the modus operandi of this blog, and it always has been. That won’t change. If you don’t like it, then don’t read this blog. It’s that simple. Some days the listserv itself can provide enough material for an entire Marx Brothers movie, and I can’t pass up an opportunity like that.

Lucky for them, we’ll have a few months off and I’ll most likely turn my attention to other things in the meantime. But come September, all bets are off.

In Other News
NPR’s Weekend Edition Sunday had a great story “From Silver Spring to the Silver Screen” about 15-year-old Michel Pinczuk from Silver Spring who is showing her short documentary L’Chaim Israel at this year’s Cannes Film Festival. It asks local Holocaust survivors what they would like to give Israel for its birthday. Outstanding to have a local filmmaker so prominently featured. Congratulations to her!

That’s how Silver Spring, Singular’s “Karl” describes Silver Spring in today’s Washingtonian Blogger Beat. Good interview with the mysterious man who helped coin and/or popularize terms like “The Promenade” and “SSINO” (Silver Spring in Name Only). Not only a great article on the blog and its writer but great press for Silver Spring as well.

I can’t agree enough with the statement about the need for an Apple Store. And under the “Local Leaders You Would Want to Fire” section, he was very kind for not calling out a name, but I’ll do it here: Marc Elrich.

And big thanks for the shout out!

Photograph by Chris Leaman

The nomenklatura was an elite class of citizens in the former Soviet Union (and other Soviet Bloc countries) who held somewhat powerful positions in almost all government activity. The term nomenklatura also referrs to the Communist Party’s authority (and willingness) to make appointments to key positions throughout the Eastern Bloc power structure.

Some also refer to the nomenklatura as the façade of democracy, as in: “Yes, we are democracy. You can vote. But you must vote for *this* person (insert ‘click’ of pistol hammer *here*).” You know - like just having one person on the ballot.

The nomenklatura is alive and well in ESSCA. (and they’re at least as old as the bastards you see above)

The new issue of our beloved “Advocate” newsletter arrived on the listserv today, and close to the end, I found this:

ELECTION OF ESSCA OFFICERS WILL OCCUR AT OUR MAY 18 MEETING.  Nominations: President: Bob Colvin; Vice President: Russell J. Shew; Treasurer: Elizabeth King; Recording Secretary: Nancy Gurganus; Corresponding Secretary: Jane Gorbaty; Chair, Committee on Planning, Zoning, and Public Works: Karen Roper.

Hmm… My listserv group home page says the ESSCA officers are:

• Pres: Bob Colvin
• Vice Pres: Russell Shew
• Treasurer: Elizabeth King
• Recording Sec: Nancy Gurganus
• Corres Sec: Jane Gorbaty
• Chair: Karen Roper, Standing Committee on Planning, Zoning, & Public Works Represents ESSCA to the State of Md. Transit Admin (MTA)

Are you fucking kidding me? When were the nominations? When did they open? When do they close? I left early from the (overly long) meeting last month, and I know I can’t run for office, but is this how it happens every year? I have to get my hands on a copy of those fucking by-laws.

Here’s another thought: Do you live within the boundaries of Georgia, Wayne, Dale, and Sligo? Are you happy about this? About the things these people are doing? No? Are you an ESSCA member? If not, you should be, because THIS IS YOUR FAULT TOO. And having only gone to two meetings, I’m as much at fault. But I’m trying to do something about it.

At this point, I don’t see the power structure changing this election, but something’s gotta be done. I WANT part of Falkland Chase redeveloped. I WANT the Purple Line, and light rail and rapid bus are cool by me. ESSCA? They “voted” against both, whatever that means. Falkland Chase isn’t even in East Silver Spring. That was the dumbest thing ever. A lot of the people there are nice enough (except for one or two, who are in desperate need of medication and a fashion update), but YOU HAVE GOT TO GET INVOLVED.

Step One: Come to the ESSCA meeting on Monday, May 18. It’s the last one until September. We’ll figure out the rest from there.

Wow. Has it been that long since my last post? Embarassing. Granted, I have been on vacation and, you know, doing stuff, but it’s about time we got back to things.

Come back to ESSCA
I did manage to make it to the April ESSCA meeting. You people should get serious about attending. We were looking at the architectural renderings of the new transit center, and one Einstein in the room came out with, “That sidewalk looks like the slippery bricks all over the sidewalks here. Is that what that is? If it is, then you better get a good lawyer, because next time I slip and fall I’m gonna SUE!”

I know the sidewalks are slippery, and people are trying to do something about that, but (A) it’s a drawing, and (2) there are much more constructive ways to convey that sentiment. Yeesh. For all the hilarity in real time, follow the Twitter stream (@essca).

The Veteran on the Plaza
Have you looked closely at the fence banner that barricades the turf area where Veteran’s Plaza is being developed? Take a good look. You’ll see some nutty stuff like this:

I don’t know who this dude is, but I’m guessing someone told the designer “make sure you put a veteran in the image.” Nice touch.

Code Enforcement Issues?
At the risk of sounding like some of the nutjobs I make fun of at the ESSCA meetings, there seems to be an overabundance of people (residents?) at this house on a regular basis.

For the record, there are six cars in the driveway/yard. Some of the people in the neighborhood have started complaining, so I looked up the property on the MoCo Housing site. No infractions listed, but if you personally know how many people are living here, send me some scoop. You may remember this place from an early post/rant. Yes, the fence still looks like shit.

Congratulations to the Navarro Campaign
Mad props to Nancy Navarro for winning the Democratic Primary for the open MoCo District 4 seat. She beat out Ben Kramer by just over 60 votes. Now on to Republican Robin Ficker in the May 19 general election. Thomas Hardman finished off his unsuccessful bout in the Democratic primary by saying he won’t run for another public office. I guess that leaves more time for him to write long-winded posts on local blogs.

Last, but not least…
Happy Star Wars Day! May the 4th be with you.